Life Before Covid-19 Will Shock Future Generations
10 Ways We Lived That Will Seem Downright Disgusting
Grandparents enliven history. Mixing memoir with the event and trends of their day, they wow us with tales about what seems unbelievably primitive. I can remember the awe of learning that my grandparents, born at the dawn of the 20th century, grew up without cars and indoor plumbing.
Today, even the oldest of millennials will have a hard time remembering life without the Internet. And people born after 2000 can’t fathom how their parents survived dial-up Internet service. So with the Covid-19 pandemic upending our lives in myriad ways, some of them potentially permanent, I wonder the stories that people age 40 and younger will someday be telling their grandchildren.
Here are a few examples of the conversations I imagine.
1. “Kids, back in the day, we used to actually shake hands when greeting each other. No, we weren’t wearing gloves. It was barehanded. And you wouldn’t even ask where the other person’s hand had been. I know, today it’d be weird to try to shake another person’s hand, but back then it was considered rude not to. In fact, it was a huge snub if you refused to shake somebody’s hand. It was expected of you, even if you didn’t really like the person. And don’t get me started on people with sweaty palms.”
2. “When I was your age, my friends and I actually had school in a building instead of online. We’d go to classrooms and sit next to other kids. They didn’t even take our temperature when we entered the building. And when I got older, I actually went away to college at this place called a campus, and lived with a bunch of other people in this building called a dormitory — we called it dorm for short. I had to live in this small room with another girl — what we used to call a roommate. We’d borrow each other’s hairbrushes and clothes. Can you believe it? And then we’d go to classes in these lecture halls and sit right next to other students — not even 6 feet apart. Some of the students even came from foreign countries, including — and I kid you not — China.”
3. “When I was a young man, I went to this place called an office for my job. Working at home, the way everybody does today, was considered a privilege. You had to get your boss’ permission to do it. And to get to that job, I had to take a subway train to that office, so I was crammed in with a bunch of other folks. Very few people wore facemasks back then, so all day long I was breathing the same air as other people. And no one ever checked to make sure you washed your hands after going to the bathroom.”
4. “Your grandma and I used to invite people to our house for these gatherings we called parties, and we’d let them sit on our furniture and use our bathroom. We’d celebrate birthdays and anniversaries that way, and we sometimes had more than a dozen people in the house at one time. Sometimes we’d serve dinner and we’d pass plates around and talk to each other without anything to cover our faces. I know, it sounds unbelievable, but we didn’t even disinfect the house after the people left.”
5. “In the old days, we used to go to these big places called theaters to watch movies. We’d sit next to total strangers to watch a film. You could buy popcorn to eat while you watched, and your grandma and I would eat out of the same bag. We didn’t know any better, I guess.”
6. “Back when I was a kid, we had actual human beings deliver mail, food, and other stuff to our homes instead of drones. They’d actually knock on our door, and they’d hand us the bag or package when we answered it. They didn’t even wear hazmat suits. And we’d just bring the stuff into the house and use it without sterilizing it first. Unbelievable, huh?”
7. “Way back when, your granddad and I used to go to these places called restaurants. They don’t exist anymore, but these were places where people would congregate to eat in a dining room with strangers. We’d have someone running back and forth from the table to serve us the food. And some of those restaurants served family style, and we would literally share food from the same plate. I know, right?”
8. “In the old days, my friends and I would go to these things called live events. We could go to see sports or music concerts in these places called stadiums or arenas. Sometimes there would be music festivals and we’d be outside, standing next to other strangers. And we’d all scream and holler and sing a lot. Can you believe how many air droplets were flying about?”
9. “When I was growing up, we never had Mass online. We actually went to a church, and sat right next to each other in these long benches called pews. I don’t know why they called them that. But listen to this — the priest would hand you a wafer to eat, barehanded, and then have you sip wine from a cup that other people drank from. It’s a wonder we didn’t all die.”
10. “Let me tell you a doozy. Back when I was a young woman, you could go on a date with somebody for the first time without verifying his viral status. Guys would just call or text a girl and ask her out to dinner or one of those movie outings I was telling you about. And don’t tell your parents I told you this, but sometimes guys and gals would even kiss on that first date. If they were really daring, they’d stick their tongues in each other’s mouths. What? Did your grandpa and I ever do that? Uh, I think it’s time for you kids to go to bed.”
